Wednesday, December 01, 2004

Choices - the return

Following the deep, unremitting tear-jerker that was the “Choices” post, I damned well better let you all know how I got on.

Quite frankly, I was a bit scared to go. Not of Jodie, she visited me while in England, and I knew we would be fine. No, the problems were two-fold.

Firstly, how would I like, or dislike Tulsa and secondly, the extended network of friends and family. The first is easy, and I will talk a little about what we did, in my next entry. The second has implications way beyond just Jodie and I, and is, therefore, much more difficult to get right.

Tom and Joe have met Jodie, albeit briefly, but they are not the only children in this equation. Jodie has three kids who have already experienced some recent changes, and I think we were both keen that they should be disturbed as little as possible. Well! To leap unerringly straight to a conclusion, it was great.

Jodie has, in the past, affectionately referred to the kids as Bitchy, Whiney and Messy (Before anyone makes the kinda point I had to listen to before, just remember, I know that Jodie would lay down her life to save a single hair on those kids heads from coming to harm)

Anyway, a week later I feel I can safely conclude that “Bitchy” isn’t … well not much, and she is also the oldest, and a good deal of fun, and more ticklish that she admits to. “Whiney” can indeed whine for America. He is also a most loving and giving child (must remember to check on which day he was born) and Messy simply should be renamed: “I don’t know who the Limey is, but I’m staying over here and watching until I am sure he has been safely defused”!

In the end, it is my view that the children will be the ones who guide what we do, when, and how. Sure they will need help and support. Of course it is the role of adults to make “adult” decisions, and we will. But we will do so according to our best assessment of where the kids are at, and what will help the most.

This is what we will do …. So who’s gonna help us?

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